Perfectionism & Overcontrol
You’re tough. You consider yourself tougher than most people. In fact, you probably get praised for your successes all the time. People are amazed. They say, how do you do it? How do you find so much time in the day? How do you work so hard? How do you have such perfect control?
But you have a deep fear that something is wrong. Why doesn’t anyone notice the real you? You feel like you are putting on a constant performing act. You don’t know what to do so you just keep going, and going, and going, feeling like you are climbing a mountain of perfection that gets steeper and steeper. You are chasing an impossibly high standard— until something inside you breaks down.
Maybe your emotions pour out in what feels like an embarrassing overreaction.
Maybe you are having outbursts of rage against people you love.
Maybe your pain turns inward against you, in acts of self-harm or self-sabotage.
Maybe your pain shows up in disordered eating patterns.
Maybe you hide yourself away, overcome by social anxiety.
I work with folks who are struggling with issues of overcontrol and perfectionism. It can be scary to consider change—to consider releasing a little bit of control—relaxing the part of the mind that drives us to achieve. But if you are feeling like this, you probably are realizing that you cannot go on like this forever. It’s not healthy and you are not happy. I want to work with you to tackle a new challenge—the challenge of resting, relaxing, and letting go. The challenge of dismantling some of the walls you’ve built to keep yourself safe and orderly…the same walls that keep other people away. I want to help you surround your own hearth with people who love and support you, and with just the right amount of the successes you want in your life—and not so much anxiety that you have to be always doing more, achieving more, and being more.